Derailing some pairings by canon (pt.2)

Hello to all the N-shippers! (yes, this is a thing now.) Firefanatic here. If you recall my last post, I decided to do some derailing of pairings. Despite all my beliefs, I actually got a lot more positive feedback than I thought. (That is, if positive feedback implies "here's my opinion stated without wringing your neck.") Because of this, I will now present you with a part two.  Let me give you N-shippers the same warning as last time: If you don't like the idea of this, stop reading. I refuse to show mercy, and those that escape my grasp will be flattened by others, I'm sure.


























You really, really okay with this? Alright, time for derailment! I will try a new format, because writing words with colons behind them is just too tiring, apparently. These may get long-winded.

First off is one that way, way too many people love, in a rabid fanboy/girl fashion.

Twixie (incoming crapstorm)

Trixie, the performer magician, and Twilight, the bookworm with a special talent of magic. Trixie is boastful and proud, and in my headcanon, violating a cultural rule by setting herself up as "the great and powerful Trixie, the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria". (That means you too, Dashie!) So what happens is Twilight one-ups Trixie by "vanquishing" an Ursa Minor, so Trixie goes on a vengeance scheme, corrupting herself with the Alicorn Amulet. Twilight tricked her into replacing that with a doorstop on a chain, and Trixie ultimately apologized (unconvincingly) and ran off, naming herself as The great and Apologetic Trixie.

Let's look at the assumptions. Before Magic duel, Trixie was thought to have ran off into the forest in the distance, gotten desperately lost and hungry, and had to subsist on pine cones and stuff like that. Some fics say she finds her way back to Ponyville or some other town, but nevertheless, Trixie suddenly has strange feelings for Twilight *coughinfatuationcough* Post Magic Duel, read the previous sentence. Most people assume that since their special talents are oh so similar, they must click. Or their names start with "T". Take your pick.

What is it that is all we really know? Well, from what I've seen, Twilight is to Trixie more of an opponent, a friendly rival, or a worthy adversary. Twilight bested her once, she came back for more. She bested her again, and she still was bold and proud, but she acknowledged her worthiness. Beside the point, I don't think It will help their relationship if Twilight grew wings and Trixie didn't.

Flutterdash

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash have been friends for years. Rainbow stood up for her when bullies teased her, and encouraged her, and I suspect she was the pony who spoke in her favor when she got into trouble, and provided first aid for her when she had a flight accident. They still continue to be friends to this day.

What is assumed is that they have been friends for so long that the feelings are bound to be deeper now! ...Right?

Alright, allow me to get slightly scientific here. We know what the friend-zone is, right? It's when one person decides another person is just a friend, and nothing more. (people, DON'T do this when it's five months in with your friend's crush on you. That's just cruel.) Friend-zoning often occurs because one person has idealized the other too much, and it actually wouldn't work out very cleanly. It also happens over time. If a guy grows up with a girl that they meet absolutely every day, the mind looks at that person and says: "That's my sister/friend." This little check prevents awful things like incest.

...Let's move on before I get stoned to death, shall we? I'm switching back, I get too opinionated.

Twipie

Observations: Twilight and Pinkie are good friends. Pinkie likes making ponies smile and is friends with everypony in ponyville. Pinkie is hyperactive and illogical, and Twilight is logical.

Assumptions: Opposites attract!

All we really know: Pinkie is busy setting up parties, seems somewhat disconnected from the world, and hasn't made a move on anypony, male or female, yet.

Twidash

Observations: Twilight is a bookworm, and doesn't excercise much. She's more interested in science, magic and math. Rainbow Dash needs everything in layman's terms, finds math boring, and reads only one book series.

Assumptions: Twilight's got the hots for dat strong cloud kickin' action! Also, Rainbow Dash has a rianbow mane, which means gay pride, so she must be lesbian!

All we really know: Twilight does not like heavy exercising, and the wonderbolts, herself and the appreciation of her friends are all that are on Rainbow's mind for now.

Rarijack

Observations: Rarity is a fashion fanatic, a dressmaker, and does not enjoy getting dirty. Applejack is a farm-pony with dirt under her hooves, speaks with a southern drawl, and prefers a hard day's good honest work. She doesn't care about the froo-froo dress stuffs.

Assumptions: OPPOSITES ATTRACT!!

All we really know: These two personalities clash pretty violently, and need a third party to settle issues. See Look Before You Sleep.



So yeah, this one came out a little a lot biased. I think you all now know how seriously I take homosexual shipping, don't you?

I'm ducking out of here before I get spiked by sharp pointy things. Firefanatic out!